During this pandemic-driven time of heightened anxiety, many people are wondering why fear is becoming an unwelcome companion to the grief that they are feeling.
When we are grieving, we are left feeling vulnerable. We have been traumatized by the death of someone we love. Death brings its own reality, and that reality is surreal at best. Suddenly we are left with a broken heart as well as the need to make sense out of this new life. Into the vortex of emotions, here comes fear.
Fear is a powerful emotion, and has been essential in our survival, providing us with information that leads us into action, keeping us safe. However, sometimes emotions alone can provoke a fear response in us. So why now, why when we are grieving does fear rise up in us? We feel untethered after the death of a loved one. We often lose our ability to focus, to see choices, to make decisions, to trust. Suddenly, we are afraid of “it” happening again, of our going crazy, of the unknown, of death itself. Fear easily moves into the vacuum of sorrow created by grief.
While fear tends to focus on the future, grief focuses on the past – we can work together to journey through your grief while not being driven by fear.
“Here is the world. Beautiful and terrible things will happen. Don’t be afraid.”
Frederick Buechner
Domenica Rafferty, LPC 