When our hearts break because someone we love has died, parts of our brain “breaks” as well. The neuroscience behind grief is fascinating as well as informative, and I will revisit the topic in another post. Today, I want to share with you how music helps us when we are grieving.
Music helps our hearts as well as our brains to heal. We often hear references to the right and left side of the brain. While neither is more important than the other, they both play significant roles in our lives. Language , reasoning, numeric, and scientific skills, as well as spoken language and objectivity, are all functions of the left side of the brain. Creativity, memory, reasoning, problem solving, as well as artistic talents, are all functions of the right side of the brain. Music actually bridges the two sides of the brain! When your heart breaks, your brain desperately needs to learn new patterns, a new “language” if you will, in order to make sense of the surrealness of death.
Music creates new connections in your brain. Neuroscience has shown us that music can engage the parts of the brain responsible for movement, emotions, perception, memories and more.
Music has been proven to stimulate the production of dopamine and serotonin. Dopamine is a neurotransmitter – which is responsible for movement, coordination, and our ability to feel pleasure. Serotonin is a hormone that helps to regulate our moods and emotions. Listening to music also helps to decrease our cortisol levels, which when left unchecked will wreak havoc on blood sugar levels.
When we are grieving, we often long for a connection with our loved one. You can use music to help you feel connected. Perhaps you can make a playlist of songs that were meaningful to you and your loved one, and even share it with family and friends. Let music be a metaphor for your life. What would music be without the periods of silence – the rests? It is these pauses, these “rests” and times of silence, which gives music its beauty. In our lives too, we need to find and define our own times of rest, time claimed by us and for us, in which we can attend to our broken hearts.
Music has been present in funerals around the world for centuries. Our hearts are helped to heal by the power of music.
Whether or not you are grieving, music is a powerful gift that brings both beauty and joy to our lives.
Domenica Rafferty, LPC 